SAM_0545As I race the final mile toward the imminent release of Saving Gracie, I am also involved in a bathroom remodel. Over the past few weeks, I have been locked in a battle with what has come to be known in this house as the Evil Glidden. Too stubborn, or perhaps too cheap to buy a gallon of a better paint, I have found ways to work around the many obstacles Glidden has thrust into my path.

The first lesson – paint in patches that do not touch one another. Once the patches are dry, paint between the patches. Do not, under any circumstances, try to paint into an area you you previously painted more than 15 seconds ago. It will have skinned over, and now it will lift off.

Eight coats seems to be about right. Painted in patches. Eventually, with sufficient overlays, the patches blend together. Then you roll a final coat just for the bumpy texture it provides.

Yesterday, Glidden dealt me a stunning blow. When I went to touch up a couple areas, I found that, despite mixing thoroughly every darn time I used the paint, the Glidden that remained in the can no longer matched the Glidden on the wall. My touch-ups dried lighter than the existing paint. Another full coat would be necessary.

I had just enough. So I carefully painted the edges, allowed the paint to dry fully, and then used a roller to apply the ninth and final coat.

As I wrapped up, I noticed a bubble. It was a large bubble, and I carelessly swiped the roller over it, thinking it might be a strange bulbous Glidden drip.

It wasn’t. An area 6″ in diameter caught the roller and lifted from the wall, then folded and tore at the center.

My 1 a.m. shriek had my husband leaping from bed.

I had a teeny bit of paint left in the roller pan, and I carefully brushed it out and into a tiny plastic container. And I waited.

This morning, I peeled off the bubble. It insisted on growing a bit larger, the Glidden effortlessly separating from the Behr primer beneath it. Then I applied joint compound and walked away.

At 9:00, I sanded. Then I applied most of the last of the Glidden to a small roller. It looked awfully white, and I crossed my fingers that it would blend into the rest of the wall.

It did.

A couple hours later, I applied the last of the Glidden in a second coat. It dried and vanished.

I have defeated the Evil Glidden! I am victorious! Fear me!

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